RHR left this morning. He’ll be gone for a week to attend to some family matters back home. That leaves me with the kids – single parent duty, which I have never done before – not with two. I feel both fearful and overwhelmed at the amount of sheer work I’m facing, and overly optimistic. I have made schedules, lowered expectations and enlisted help. I’ve made easy-cook meal plans and have purchased paper plates and plastic cutlery. We have booked FaceTime with Daddy every night. We have prepared the kids for being separated from him. I think I’ve got a handle on this. And yet, I know that I don’t. I know that life with two young children is totally predictable, and it soooo isn’t. I know enough to know that I’ll be ok, and also that I am totally screwed. And I have a Netflix line-up for after their bedtime and a few bottles of wine in the fridge, to keep me sane. I know that there will be laughter galore and battling allergies, and there will undoubtedly at some point be some shouting and some tears – from at least one of the three of us. I know I won’t get much done. That’s ok. I’ve booked us for Mother’s Day Brunch at a restaurant that knows us – walking distance from our place. And I am emotionally and mentally prepared to hear the call from my sweetie that he’s not coming home at the expected time. We’re gonna get through this, one way or another.
And so, I’ve decided to unplug for the week. The kids only get one parent right now, and they are gonna get all of me. I won’t be checking Facebook or email or googling anything (not even allergy stuff). I won’t be reading my WordPress Reader. I won’t be checking in on my stats. All I will allow myself is my German practice while I’m in the shower, and the pollen count forecast. And, obviously, FaceTime with Daddy. For a week. Holy cow. Seems impossible.
I remember a time when this was all there was. Just the moment you were in, remembering the past, dreaming about the future. Sure, we had radio and TV and books and newspapers and magazines – but that’s all. We wrote letters. We called people. We had – wait for it – conversations. Pretty much, wherever you were, you were present.
That’s what I’m going to be this week – I’m going to be: here.
So, say a prayer for me. And I’ll see you in a week (or so) with a full report. Wish me luck!